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Day 87

Anger

I’m still arguing with him in my head. I’m still explaining what happened to people in my head. I’m still having conversations with his new gf warning her to not let him out of her sight in my head. It’s pissing me off. It’s keeping me awake.

I posted a photo a couple days ago which shows I’m in the general vicinity of where he lives (though it’s a plane ride away) and one of his friends commented to tell him hi. She obviously is behind the curve since we broke up 8 months ago, haven’t spoken in 4, and he’s on the east coast with my replacement. I ignored it but I’ve been explaining to her in my head why I can’t tell him hi. I’m resisting commenting back because what I want to say is beneath me and there’s no reason to be that much of a bitch about it. He’s not worth relinquishing my dignity by stooping to insult him.

It still annoys me that he’s such a douche but is so beloved because no one knows. Everyone just thinks he’s a miracle and dotes on him.

What pisses me off most is that I still care.

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