Prev Next

Day 65

Cheating

So I need your views on this every1?
If you are in a relationship and your partner cheats on you what would you do ?
Would you cheat back ?
Would you stay with them ?
Would you try to heal the relationship?
Would you trust them again?
Or as the saying goes ...
Once a cheat always a cheat
Why would you cheat anyway if you were happy ?
I need to get peoples opinions here , would you tell your friend if you saw there partner cheating ?

Show Comments (11)

  • SpreadZero SpreadZero
    3 months ago

    If it wasn't communicated prior to "the cheating" that your partner was ok to "play" with another person, then say goodbye. Blatant dishonesty is not worth even the most perfect relationship.

    After the number of relationships I've had, I wouldn't waste a second on this person. I'd pack all their bags & belongings and throw them on the driveway, and demand my house keys back immediately. NOPE. IT IS OVER. Life is way too short to deal with child-like adults that can't control their damn sexual urges. They should stay single instead of destroying the lives of others simply out of selfish urges.

    If you go back, you've disappointed yourself.

    Advice Rating:

  • Otter Otter
    3 months ago

    I think it all depends on the situation and the people involved. I've only come across one relationship in which the husband cheated, the wife stayed, and they managed to heal and strengthen their relationship. So the odd of that happening are incredibly slim, but not impossible. It's been a decade since, and they seem very happy.

    On the other hand, my best friend kept going back to her wife who was an avid-cheater and psychologically-manipulative. My friend kept going back for years until one day (during one of their "breaks"), her wife was in a car wreck with a mistress, and the mistress was killed. The wife then proceeded to make the marriage even more toxic that, when my friend finally left her for good, my friend's life was in shambles. She's still picking up all the pieces.

    However, I believe a majority of relationships, once someone has cheated, will begin to rot and become toxic - no matter the intentions of either party or whether the offender is actually remorseful.

    Advice Rating:

  • RavDiablo RavDiablo
    3 months ago

    I've never cheated myself, but I know couples where a partner has cheated and it was a wake up call for the couple, and they put in a lot of work and stayed together. I know another couple where one member cheats and the partner turns a blind eye to it; she keeps it hidden, and he's fine with it. For others, well, it's a total dealbreaker. It's all contextual....

    Advice Rating:

  • miranda_b miranda_b
    3 months ago

    I’ve been cheated on and I tried to forgive and move past it, there were extenuating circumstances from his brain injury and memory problems that I tried to use to justify his behavior to myself so I could forgive him. But trust was shattered anyways. We may have fixed it given time, but he ended up leaving the relationship because it was “too hard”.
    I think what was too hard was knowing he has disappointed me and knowing he could no longer live up to my expectations of him.

    Advice Rating:

  • George Smith George Smith
    3 months ago

    Why do you ask Bette? If my husband cheated on me my reaction wouldn't be to cheat on him. I honestly have no idea what I would do. I think a lot would depend on why he cheated and what he wanted to do now. You have affairs... has your husband found out? Has he cheated on you? I haven't known of a single couple who are happy in an open relationship although many have tried it. Who knows - if both are happy with whatever all is good. It's when one person makes the other suffer that it's no good.

    Advice Rating:

  • Bettedavis Bettedavis
    3 months ago

    No it's my son and girlfriend
    He cheated so she did it back
    Its complicated....

  • George Smith George Smith
    3 months ago

    Do they have kids? If not they should split now before they do. It's only complicated if they have children. What do you think?

    Advice Rating:

  • As someone who's been cheated on by every single person iv'e dated (except one), i know how painful it can be to realise that your partner has been unfaithful.
    It depends if you still trust them, if you can still picture yourself with them in five, ten years. Do you want to work it out, weed out the root of the problem and try to fix things. Or has the trust gone? For me, personally, the few times the person wanted to stay with me after they cheated, i walked away. The trust was gone and i couldn't ever see myself believing in them again.

  • Bettedavis Bettedavis
    3 months ago

    No kids 3 year relationship
    Personally I think it's dead in the water but my Son ????

  • George Smith George Smith
    3 months ago

    It is finished, just as you say. Good they don't have kids. That does make it simple. What about your son? He was the stray. Why? And now she has. Why? If there was no problem neither of them would have done this.

    Advice Rating:

  • Befalus Befalus
    3 months ago

    My husband cheated and I stayed. If you go back there's a few entries on here about it, so you'll get the bigger picture on why he did it.
    I never cheated back but damn I wanted to. I decided not to get to the same level as him. I decided to grow and help him grow into the relationship we both needed, deserved and respected.
    I stayed because I couldn't imagine a life without him; where I didn't want to text him the latest meme I just found or how my day at work was going, or find out his opinion on something. I have never forgiven, but we have got past it. Time has not made it any easier to deal with, but time has given us more better times to bond over.
    It will be entirely up to them whether they stay together, but I can say if both parties want it enough, it can work. I hope this helps you and your family. Love to everyone xx

    Advice Rating:

You need to be registered or signed in to post a comment

Register

Welcome to Pencourage.

|

Dismiss Notification

Back To Top