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Day 209

Dear Chris

You're the only reason I look at the moon and feel small. You're the reason I still wish on stars. You're the reason I write sad love songs. You're the reason I go to sleep feeling cold. You're the reason I don't understand. You're the reason I have regret and rue. You're the reason every, single, time I look into the distance and have a far away gaze in my eyes, dream-like and unreal, I'm thinking of you.

I wonder what I'm the reason for in your life. In your head. Man, I bet none of it is good.

I do one thing, one kiss and hang out with a dude and I'm exiled for life. You do what you did and I keep letting you back. Even now. I can't even tell you the lengths I would go.

But this is all a dream. None of this matters. Me, I don't matter. Not any more. These thoughts and feelings, I suppose they don't matter either. It doesn't matter because you don't feel this, you don't think this. We are on two completely separate wavelengths.

I'm leaving forever not too long away in the future. I've got to escape this longing for you.

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