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Day 228

Dear Chris,

It's rainy today.
What I wouldn't give to be laying by a log fire reading a book with you entwining with me. Seriously.
I was always my best, most comfortable self with you, it's bizarre. I had so many reasons so be shy and insecure because I believed I wasn't good enough for you, but I was so happy to have you to myself either way. Because whether I was good enough or not, you chose me.

I wish I could hear your voice by that fire, reading me something or just chattering away about anything. About everything. I wish I could play with your hair and your eyebrows. Touch your hands. Look at those big eyes of yours. It's crazy the little details I remember about you.

Even long after I'm gone, your memory and that love will be carved into my memory. I wonder what you're doing today. I wonder if you're okay. I wonder if you saw my new poem, but probably not since you're not on Instagram any more. I wonder... Sigh. I wonder so many things that I'll never know the answer to. I need to quiet my mind for a while.

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