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Day 6

Lets be friends

Really need a friend right now.
Lost all of mine several years back thanks to an abusive ex and he left me in such an unconfident state, a state propped up by my critical, rejecting mother, that iv'e never sought to make more.

Really wanna change that, though i have no idea how. I don't drink, i don't do drugs, i don't really go out that much and when i do, i'm much too cripplingly shy to talk to anyone.
But i want a life, a better life for myself. I want to fall in love, get married, like everyone else does, and be happy with whoever chose me to be 'their person'.

I mean, whoever it is, will have to have nerves of steel and strong patience. Lol.
I have more emotional baggage than an airport, alongside Autism, severe General & Social Anxiety Disorders, a fat body that resembles Jabba The Hut, and a heart thats worn and fractured.

My own mother proclaims that i am 'too hard to love'.
Iv'e almost accepted that i am. Well...acknowledged. Not accepted.
Accepted implies feeling no pain at the thought of being alone forever.
Never truly loved. At thirty-eight, thats a sad thought-process to be in.

Show Comments (2)

  • Bettedavis Bettedavis
    4 months ago

    You can and you will
    Make that your Mantra

  • SpreadZero SpreadZero
    4 months ago

    Being everywhere at the same time is your answer. Start by making a list of your hobbies on a piece of paper. Now, how many of these hobbies have Clubs / Groups you can join? Is there a softball team or art club or gardening club you can join? There are numerous bowling leagues, for example. Simply find your niche in life without friends. It's that easy.

    Guess what happens when you show up? There are new friends next to you looking forward to seeing you.

    Yes, you can. Much love to you xo

    Advice Rating:

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