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Day 643

My 18 year old son

Same thing different day. Sunny wouldn’t get out of bed. It was a beautiful morning. He wouldn’t switch off last night. And I’m the ‘arsehole’. He finally rolled over and took up his phone and started laughing with his friends. It felt like a slap in the face. I cried. He swore at me, so many times. Told me he didn’t respect me, that I’d spoiled him, that the way he was was my fault. I had made him lazy.

I had breakfast on my own, crying all the time. He came and sat opposite me just as I had managed to compose myself. We didn’t say anything. Went upstairs and put our kit on. He was taking his time. So I went down and put my boots on. Still no Sunny. I decided I had had enough. Finally I went off on my own which I should have done an hour before. It was just starting to snow.

Determinedly I skied for three hours. We met for lunch. He was pissed off with me. Why had I left him without telling him I was going? I asked why he didn’t come. I told him he should apologise. He wouldn’t. We separated.

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