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Day 152

Preparations of the Den

Bear kicked Raven out. Honeybun's mother asked that Bear's son (Cub) live with us at least two days a week. We will absolutely do this, but it will shake up our home life for a while. We live in a tiny apartment that is /definitely/ not baby-proofed. I look around, and all I see are a hundred different ways Cub could accidentally hurt himself. We weren't planning to have kids of our own yet, so there are many things that need to be done.

Cub is 3 and speaks exclusively in baby babbles - doctors have said it's due to neglect and bad parenting. He has no understanding of language. He throws incredible tantrums that include throwing objects (and his body) or hitting/scratching because he's had no discipline and gets frustrated when he can't communicate. He can be very violent and screams at ear-piercing levels regularly. He reminds me of a young Helen Keller - feeling alone and confused in a world he cant understand.

Honeybun and I walked around together, considering the changes we are about to make to our home and our lives temporarily. We will hold each-other up and do our best to help Cub grow and learn.

Show Comments (2)

  • RavDiablo RavDiablo
    3 weeks ago

    Just a question: has he had a hearing test done? And for a doctor to attribute this to "bad parenting" and "neglect" sounds out of place - Bear should really start with a psychologist. There may be an actual issue. When I was studying infant development, one of the things that caused this type of behavior later on were developmental delays due to otitis medea, which is hearing loss caused by infections. This lack of being able to hear the sounds of the language resulted in the child not developing awareness of sounds and how to produce them, and then, well, if you can't communicate, then you end up throwing a lot of tantrums due to frustration...... just sayin....

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  • Otter Otter
    3 weeks ago

    A little over a year ago they started taking him to different professionals. He's had several hearing tests done (they'd thought the same thing at first), and he's been tested for other medical conditions as well. They analyzed him for months with different doctors to see if he may be on the spectrum or have Asperger's - which they believe he shows no signs of, but will test for again when he's older. He's been to around 5 different psychologists, and after a while they would diagnose the issue as an effect of neglect and lackadaisical parenting (worded much more politely, I'm sure). Whenever Bear and Raven would hear this, they'd get upset and take him to another professional for an additional opinion - where they would get the same answer. Raven would be the one at home with him all day, and she would get high and play videogames the entire day. CPS has been called on them twice - once because they hadn't bathed him in weeks and he smelled like vomit and shit, and once because she'd done acid while watching him and posted pictures about it to her social media. We suspect he may be additionally cranky because he doesn't get enough sleep - he isn't on any kind of sleep schedule and tends to only get about 5 hours at night, with no naps.

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