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Day 81

Search for Meaning

I've found my meaning and purpose.

To help teens out there who are going through the same struggles that I have gone through, coming from a dysfunctional family..

with an absentee/abusive father... overly submissive mother who deals with problems by hiding in her room for hours or days at a time.. and dealing with brothers and sisters who've learned to live life by looking for things to fill that hole left by what's supposed to be a "family"

Or so I thought.

I started studying for masters last year, majoring in Guidance and Counseling.

Then got into a depressive episode early this year on my second semester. And I stopped going to uni.

I feel like I just lost my purpose again.

Like, what am I really supposed to do with my life?

I want to give back. I want to help others.

It seems like I've been dealing with myself too much these past months. Trying to know what's wrong with me.

I HAVE to look within, to prepare myself for everything that happens around me. To know how to deal. To handle things.

I don't even have the energy to go volunteering now.

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