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Day 71

Worried About Mom

She hasn't had a regular job in almost 30 years and has been a Stay-At-Home Wife/Mom all my life. She currently runs her own dog-sitting business out of their house: Some months she will do really well by it, but other times she'll go a month without business. I worry because her health is awful, she's always dehydrated because she hates drinking water, and she falls regularly due to bad hips, back, vertigo, and more.

She's alone all day until Dad returns from work, and sometimes longer when he goes out-of-state - which is happening more regularly now since his change of position. I'm always worried while he's away, because Mom refuses to use her cane ("I'm only 58, I'm not OLD!"), climbs forbidden ladders (she falls off them regularly), and has a hard time getting up when she falls. I'm scared she'll fall while Dad is away, or have a stroke, and be unable to reach her cellphone for help.

I've suggested a Life-Alert, but she just gets offended. Maybe I'll save up for an Apple Watch: Those have a feature that calls for emergency help when it senses a fall and monitors heart-rate. She'd like the expensiveness of it...

Show Comments (2)

  • George Smith George Smith
    9 months ago

    What about encouraging her to do some exercise? And pursue something she's interested in?

    Advice Rating:

  • Otter Otter
    9 months ago

    I've tried convincing her to go on walks, take up a hobby, or volunteer somewhere, but she always complains that she's "too busy" or "too depressed." She usually uses the "Depressed" excuse to jab at me. She never says it, but she strongly hints that she's "depressed" because I've moved out and she doesn't approve of Honeybun - mostly because she thinks he's supposed to make more money and support me. I'm starting to believe she's letting her health deteriorate to make me feel guilty, as she's always claiming she "doesn't have much longer to live" since her relatives passed in their 60s. However, many of them passed because they were very poor and couldn't afford healthcare. She wants me to move back home and stay forever. Even still, I love her and worry, so I will take up your advice and try encouraging her some more. Thanks, George.

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