Life goes on
It doesn't matter how important you think you are, life just goes on and will always do. Life is a force that we contribute to but eventually our force stops and We're thrown from the wheel that spins.
I'm being a bit philosophical here but who cares.
I did and probably still do have these unintentional thoughts about killing myself but I need to get on with things as life just goes on. I overthink and under speak.
Xmas anxiety has started that I can't afford the best presents for my family, I know I'll end up feeling like a failure if I don't overspend on them BUT I earn the most and spend the least in the house. That's not a criticism of my wife.
If end my life, life just goes on and I won't see things that would bring me happiness.
I have only got one life. I can't take money with me.