I've lost myself in doing everything for others
Honeybun brought up an interesting point yesterday. I've been doing too much for him, for everyone, and nothing for myself. For months I've been the one paying for 2/3rd of the rent/utilities because first Honeybun wasn't being given enough hours at work and then he was sick. I'm the one to pay every time we go out. I'm paying the Emergency Room bill from when he was taken to the hospital. I do the laundry, cook dinner, wash the dishes. I've been feeling so bored with my life lately and expressed that I didn't have time to enjoy anything. I don't know who I am.
I didn't fully understand why until Honeybun told me I was trying to do too much. He is finally back at work now that he's feeling better, and he's considering getting a second job. He isn't going to be able to afford his cellphone bill this month, and when I offered to take care of it he told me no - he needs to do this on his own. He sees the pressure I'm under and says he will do more to take some of the load off of me.
I just want to help everyone.