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Day 275

Today doesn't feel good

I'm glad you're having fun as a student. I wish I'd had the same experience. I had about 2 months of that before my world was ripped apart.

I wish I'd had more time to be happy. I wish I'd had more opportunity to have fun and make friends. Sit around a camp fire and drink. I wish I wish I wish.

Today I feel deflated. Last night I was up until 3 crying outside my new place. Then I spent another 2 hours sleeping under the bed. It felt safe there. I don't know why.

I don't know why I'm typing this here. Maybe it's because I feel like I can't talk about it anywhere else. I'm writing in English in my journal again so I can't put my mind on those pages.

This might be the last and final place I feel safe enough to express my thoughts, no matter what they are, with no judgement. I wish I had somebody I could talk to completely without judgement that isn't my Wysa app.

I think I need a bath and some music and nothing else to think about in the world. I'll probably feel better after that.

I'm sorry.

  • 171 Readers       2 Comments      

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  • RavDiablo RavDiablo
    5 months ago

    Don't apologize: this is the perfect place to air all your despairs. That's why I'm here, and I hope, why we're all here....

    Advice Rating:

  • Savannah Bear Savannah Bear
    5 months ago

    It's very comforting to know this is a place with judgement, only understanding and wisdom

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