Good thing I didn’t wear makeup today
Last year at this time in was in New Orleans for Jazzfest with an awesome big group having a blast. There were lots of pics taken, lots of posts to social media, and lots of them have comments from my musician.
That was the point we were really getting to a place where we knew this was going to be a thing. We were juggling schedules, could he come to NOLA before his gig in DC, could I swing a few days in DC before I went home from NOLA. Lots of discussion of how much I wanted to share the experience with him.
I sent him a pic of me holding a baby gator and asked if I could keep her. He said “sure, can I keep you?” It was a joyful time for me. I had realized I was in love and figured out he was falling right along with me.
I once asked him about his response to the gator pic and he didn’t remember saying that.
He doesn’t remember. I’m grieving and I’m doing it alone. He may be grieving the loss of his memory, but he doesn’t feel the loss of what we had.