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Day 173

I'm Still Struggling With Thoughts Of You.


Today I feel like I can't stay still. I'm struggling again. These types of days have become so frequent and I've no idea how to stop them.

You're gone.

You're gone.

There's nothing I can do. We needed to part. Us not being able to be together was killing us both. But after all is gone and buried, your memory reminds, burned into the deepest parts of my heart and mind.

At night I still long for your touch. My skin tickles with the lingering memories of you holding me, safe and warm, in your loving arms.

I sing to you in the shower, still. I don't think I ever stopped. I still write you letters, I never stopped that either - I think it's because I felt so incredibly comfortable opening up to you. I think it's because I stop love you.

But the memory of you I've purposely fragmented, for my own good. I've taken away your drugs, I've taken away the alcoholism, I've taken away your - our fear of relationships. Getting too close.

All that remains is all I ever saw in you - goodness, love, a future.

We had to separate, but seeing you as I drove away will forever haunt me.

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