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Day 38

on Giving Up or Moving On

Once upon a time, from 15 y/o I had a dream. A silly one, rooted in immaturity and optimism over common sense. But for me it was what I wanted. Silly, really. Work at least one ski season. I wanted to snowboard. A lot.

Took me ten years to get there, talked about it with my Dad on his deathbed. But I got there. And lasted three months. For various reasons, partly that optimism over common sense.

I vowed to go back, needed to try again. Don't know if I'll ever be able to let this one go if I don't. Plan was to do that, then go to University and get on with my life. White Whale defeated.

Somewhere around there I met a girl. And I love her, most of the time (see previous entries for my doubts). She doesn't want me to go and now I've skipped over that step. Now I'm looking at University and I'm pushing 30 and it's probably about time anyway.

Question is: Will I ever not regret it?

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