Day 1

Struggling

I applied for a job I liked the look off, messed them about before the interview, they still liked me and offered me the job. I messed them about even more then turned it down. Burned my bridges. Turned it down out of fear, of being out of my comfort zone, I don’t know. So, I’m staying in my old job because I was too scared to resign. And now, I’ve made massive mistakes and my boss knows, she doesn’t trust me and it’s a downward spiral. In one day, I’m terrified that I’m going to be fired from my job, which has bored me to tears for a year but it means financial security. I don’t even enjoy it and I’m certainly not good at it. I have self-sabotaged to the point that I can’t apply again to this massive employer and now I’m catastrophising that I’m going to lose a job I don’t like and I’m not good at, because I’m scared of not having money. I’ve made a real, awful mess of it all.

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